Anger, Love, and Soulsearching
by callikat
Summary: Lennon is an edgy girl on the outside, fighting to forget about her mother's sudden death. She is then sent to live in La Push with her father and his new wife. Can she forget her old, mellow hippie style life and move on? Standing for nothing but peace and love, she falls for the most violent, angry werewolf of them all.


_I own nothing but Lennon, her mom, her dad, and his wife. Hope you enjoy :)_

My wandering eyes searched over hundreds of people running to relatives, reuniting with their loved ones, and I noticed plenty of heartfelt smiles. The happiness radiating off of everyone was kind of smothering me, and it was thick through the atmosphere. I was probably the only person standing in the airport, unhappy and frowning.

I walked a bit deeper into the crowd, and wished I hadn't. There in front of me stood my dad and his new wife (which I particulary didn't care for) holding a huge white sign with "Welcome Home Lennon!" on it. I grimaced and forced my mouth into a smile.

Dad dropped the sign and sprinted towards me, embracing me into a life threatening hug. No seriously, if he would've hugged me any tighter my oxygen surely would've been cut off.

"Heya, Dad." I muttered. Amber, the wife, was flashing a huge smile at me from behind him. She was waving at me, but I continued to act like I couldn't see her.

"Kiddo! I've missed you so much! I haven't seen you in what, years? You've changed so much!" He said hesistantly, eyeing my nose piercing.

I looked down at my outfit, and stuffed my hands into my black leather jacket. "Didn't exactly turn out to be the flower child you and Mom both wanted, eh?" I said with a bit of sarcasm, pushing past him, my black heels clicking as I walked.

Amber looked awkwardly at my father and tucked a piece of her bleached blonde hair behind her ear. "Oh, hon, want me to help you carry some of those bags?" She asked me politely, too much sweetness leaking out of her mouth for my own taste.

"Nah," I said not making eye contact with her. I hoisted another bag over my shoulder and threw one into my dads open arms. "Alright, let's get on the road. This place is making me squeamish."

Sure, I was absolutely devasted by my mom's passing, but I was also pissed. Her getting into a car wreck was the worst thing that has ever happened to me. It's ruined my life, quite honestly. I did live in New York City, and as hectic as a life I had, I loved it.

See Mom and I, we were quite the pair. She was a modern day hippie (my name is Lennon for a reason, after Lennon himself), and our little apartment always felt welcoming, and warm. She was constantly playing music on our ancient record player, and we meditated together every night right after dinner.

Candles were always lit throughout the house, and there was always a window open somewhere in our cozy little homestead, allowing a cool draft to sift through the apartment. We had band posters everywhere, and almost every wall had a tapestry on it.

We enjoyed countless cups of tea in the morning while the sun rose, and at night we would go up on the roof of our building and just lie there, admiring the view of the night sky and pondering about the meaning of life.

Dad was in my life until I was about seven. Mom and Dad met at some music festival, and apparently fell in love while dancing to The Doors. Dad was a free spirit of some sort, always being barefoot, having hair past his shoulders, and taking mom on adventures constantly to go "soul-searching". Kind of cute, hm?

When we moved to New York was when things went downhill. Mom was a painter, and Dad hopped from job to job, and together, they weren't bringing in enough income. I remember everything was always tense, and the loving, carefree atmosphere just wasn't hanging around anymore.

One evening Dad tucked a daisy behind Mom's ear and turned on an old vinyl, expecting Mom to get up and dance with him. Mom bit her lip, set the daisy on the floor, and walked to her bedroom and softly shut the door behind her. That was the moment I realized she no longer loved him anymore. But maybe she never did love him.

"Lennon...Lennon...Earth to Lennon!" I heard my dad saying while chuckling. "Hey buckaroo, we're home!"

I drowsily sat up and wiped away the matted hair to my face. Had I been asleep for that long? "Sorry pa, I didn't realize the drive was going to be that long...or that I was that tired."

I reached for my bags but Amber gently pushed my hand away. "No Len, s'okay. Go on in the house and we'll get your bags. The door is unlocked."

I nodded slightly and took in my surroundings. Their house, well my house now, was somewhat sweet looking. It was tiny, but seemed cozy. It was surrounded by nothing but woods, and that made me ecstatic.

I guess I can think Mom for helping me become the nature freak that I was. Now don't get me wrong, I am no "tree-hugger" on the outside. I stick to the more edgy look, and I take pride in my leather jackets and red lipstick. Hippie mother has biker gang daughter with a soft side...typical?

I ventured into the house, and took a look around. A wave of sadness came over me when I saw no Bohmeian rugs, paintings, or posters. And no matter how hard I listened, I knew I wouldn't be hearing The Beatles playing from the other room.

I plopped down on the couch and quickly wiped away a tear from my eye before it fell. No weakness, Len. Show no weakness. You are not sad. This is a new start. I told myself repeatedly.

Dad and Amber came pushing through the front door, each carrying some of my bags. "Come on Lennon, your bedroom is right down the hall. Follow me, kiddo." Dad said grinning.

I followed reluctantly and walked into what was my room. The walls were aqua blue, and there was a queen bed with an orange bedspread on it. There was a nightstand and a dresser, and my face lit up when I saw a bookshelf. Not too shabby I guess.

"Sorry Len, it's nothing special. But I didn't know if you still had the same taste in music or anything as you did when you were a kid, so I decided to leave the decorating up to you." Dad said nervously.

I smiled gently at him and patted him on the shoulder. "Nah, it'll work pops. I brought all my posters with me, so this isn't a problem at all. These walls will look incredible with my Pink Floyd poster."

Dad laughed softly and kissed me on the top of my head. "Same ole Lennon. I'll admit though, all the leather did surprise me. I was expecting a poncho and flowers in your hair."

I couldn't help but giggle and raised an eyebrow at him. "Get outta here old man, I see that you finally decided to chop those long, lovely locks off? Oh, and you're wearing shoes! What an improvement!"

Dad laughed heartily and shoved me lightly. Amber stood there looking clueless, but still had a smile on her face. Ugh, made me want to slap her. The "no violence" thing I was taught growing up really didn't stick with me.

Dad walked out of the room and Amber lingered around, awkwardly. I turned my back towards her and started unpacking my things. I knew she had something to say, but she was kind of nervous to. I would be, too.

After five minutes of pure silence, the awkwardness was getting too much for me to handle. I turned towards her and hesitantly said, "Um, Amber...is there a reason you're still in here?"

She looked surprised and her cheeks became bright red. "Oh yes, I'm sorry Lennon. Uh well, I just wanted to tell you that if you ever need anything, and I mean anything, and you don't want to go to your dad with it, I'll always be here. Now I know I will never, ever replace your mom, but I just wanted you to know that."

I looked down at her feet, deliberately not making eye contact. Isn't it a little too soon for the "Hey, I know your Mom's dead but your dad and I are screwing, so I'll be around for awhile, might as well like me" speech?

I nodded and mumbled, "Yeah thanks."

She turned around and eased out of the room. I let out a sigh of relief when I thought I was alone, and then she popped her head back in the doorway. I held back a scowl and asked, "Yes?"

"Hey, sorry, I forgot to mention this, but there's going to be a bonfire tonight down at the beach. A group of us go every so often, and you're welcome to tag along with your Dad and I tonight. It starts at seven, and we'll leave at 6:45." She said quickly with a smile.

I nodded again and said, "Okay, thanks Amber."

She stood there smiling at me for a couple seconds more, and then walked away. Thank God. How will I ever cope with her kindness?

_Alright, sorry, no werewolves in this chapter. :(_

_But hey, they'll all make an appearance next chapter! I hope you like!_


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